Sometimes It’s Not What You’re Holding, It’s What You’re Sinking In

Sometimes strength is giving yourself the opportunity not to hold it anymore. Everything that you find on your plate every day, everything that you’re terrified to drop because of what might shatter. Sometimes strength is allowing yourself the ability to know that life still goes on and things will still be okay if you put it down. Because sometimes it’s not what we’re holding, it’s what we’re standing in…

We convince ourselves that our plate is full, that it’s too heavy, that we can’t carry it anymore…and what we fail to realize is that really, we are sinking. It wasn’t what was on our plate, it is what we are rooted in; the quicksand that we are sinking slowly under…the beliefs and the programming that we’ve come to put on ourselves, to suggest that we are responsible for it all, that it is our job to fix it…to save everyone, to make it all better at any expense…at every expense.

“Don’t dare move” we tell ourselves as we reach over to pick other things up either as a distraction to what is really going on or because we feel we are supposed to…but then you begin to understand that you must put some of those things down, even if temporarily, so that you can start to climb out of what you’re actually sinking in because it was never what you were holding…it was always the weight of what has been pulling you down…the judgment of others, the ridicule, the shame…the worry that you’re not good enough…

It’s time you give yourself some grace and know that the things that are important will still be there when you’ve healed enough to pick them back up and if they aren’t it’s because they were never yours to have to hold to begin with… but understand this… when you find yourself in this space, they are already beginning to fracture the longer you hold them because you will soon realize that the grip you have is so tight that you’re not actually holding them, you’re shattering them beneath your clenched fist.